London Marriage Counselling
Marriage Counselling Couples’ Therapy
There are many good reasons to see a Marriage Counsellor.
The most common one is of course being in crisis: Having frequent arguments, growing apart or even infidelity and pending separation.
Often, people ask themselves, “How did my Prince Charming suddenly turn into my mother/father?” – and their partners might wonder, “How did my lovely wife suddenly turn into her/my critical, bickering mother?” – and vice versa. These are excellent questions to be worked upon with a couples’ therapist, as they go to the very core of our personality, our roots, our pain that we unconsciously act out.
It is no coincidence that we act out our worst behaviour with our nearest and dearest.
In Jungian therapy, this would be described as our ‘Shadow’. Even if you feel your relationship is non-salvageable, couples therapy is still very useful to:
a) separate well (research shows that many people still feel mistrust and anger many years after a marriage break-up) and
b) let go of pain and old patterns that will otherwise hold you back in future relationships.
Other reasons to enter marriage counselling include preparation for marriage/co-habitation and personal growth. Often, one partner has had an experience of individual therapy and then wishes to deepen the relationship with their partner, to get to know each other better, to become more loving with each other and also to get to know one’s own darker side, one’s shadow, more with the help of the mirroring and feed-back of the partner.
This is profound – sometimes hard, but loving and enriching – work, that helps us to break old destructive patterns, to heal childhood wounds and to become the loving people we were meant to be.
What is Marriage Counselling?
Marriage counselling deepens our understanding and acceptance of each other as well as giving us the tools to communicate more fruitfully with each other. It is a rich experience, and, potentially, one with the greatest opportunity for personal and spiritual growth. Thus, some couples attend marriage counselling for many years, on and off, not due to a crisis, but to continue to grow more loving and fulfilled together. In practice, if you like, I will teach you how to communicate more effectively (and lovingly!) with each other, how to listen, and how to communicate to your partner that you have understood.
We will also help you to clarify your hopes and thoughts to make better decisions. Another possible dimension of Marriage Counselling is to work on your dreams together, which can lead to profound insights into your unconscious processes.
I have a long-standing interest in Imago Couples Therapy, combining this with other strategies, to best help each individual couple in their therapy according to what they need.
Marriage Counselling – Arrangements
Some couples who come for marriage counselling have found the usual 50 min appointments do not give them enough time to go deep enough – longer couples therapy sessions are available after prior arrangement (in London W9) and will be charged pro rata.